I had this vision in my head of achieving a layered look like Martyna Budna’s easy look above.  Androgynous but rock starry flavoured with a little horse play (it’s the Marc Jacobs shoes). And just as my hunt for the perfect pair of skinny jeans rounded a corner last weekend…. (it’s only taken up an ungodly proportion of my adult life?) the fashion world calls time on me.

My focus and my pant leg have narrowed over the weekend

As of Sunday, I can officially declare that I’m sticking with the skinny leg regardless. My focus and my pant leg have narrowed over the weekend.

You know I said that this summer would be about finally finding that perfect pairs of jeans? Well I see, in Paris, all the Lou Doillon types are still strolling about in their black Balenciaga drainpipes and platform wedges.  Who said they were O-V-E-R?

‘Damn, I thought as I shuffled past girls in their newest painted-on skinnies, Where did they find those giraffe like straight legs?’ I think like anything you have to listen to your inner voice and I can never imagine myself in anything that resembles the current love for denim flares. Can you?

Did I tell you that I think the right jeans can make me look taller? But bear with me for a sec, because I’ve been  hunting and scribbling furiously and have found out quite by accident that maybe despite what shops are touting there may be actual benefits to continuing the skinny jean trend.

Firstly, most pairs I’ve tried have made my legs look longer. Really you’re thinking. How? I’ll probably be guillotined for suggesting that is has something to do with the cut but in these Sass & Bide Skinny Boy Skin Tight Uniqlo super skinny specials and Topshop Moto black Leigh skinny shapes I think I felt a little taller. Seriously after trying on what seemed like 5,000 pairs, I looked taller in these three.

Secondly they made my legs look slimmer. And this I can explain, they have some sort of narrowing suction action.

Thirdly, the shades are dark, which is flattering, smart, versatile and any more buzz words you want to add just to strengthen my case here.

Fourthly, they offer a kind of bum corsetary.

Fifthly, the jeans I love the most are easy to find everywhere and thankfully they’re affordable.

Sixthly the perfect pair makes all other trends magically do-able, from T-shirts to ‘boyfriend jackets’ (layered if possible), clunky wedge shoes with a wedge the size of a doorstop (and even  with ballet flats with a visible cuff turned up on the outside, when I’ll have to revert to wearing flats because I’ll have almost kissed the Parisian pavement a few times.)

And, um have I told you about the most important point of all, number seven…. because they’re what I would consider ‘an investment piece’, I may have to bulk purchase????

Speaking of which some other brands (who shall remain nameless to protect the innocent) did dig into my hips a bit. You know my struggle. You’re not laughing at me are you?